The American industrialist, Henry Ford, was once asked to donate money for the construction of a new medical facility. The billionaire pledged to donate $5,000. The next day in the newspaper, the headline read, "Henry Ford contributes $50,000 to the local hospital." The irate Ford was on the phone immediately to complain to the fund-raiser that he had been misunderstood. The fund-raiser replied that they would print a retraction in the paper the following day to read, "Henry Ford reduces his donation by $45,000." Realizing the poor publicity that would result, the industrialist agreed to the $50,000 contribution in return for the following: That above the entrance to the hospital was to be carved the biblical inscription: "I came among you and you took me in."

"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,"
 -- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky Basketball Forward.
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 "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
 -- Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington, D.C.
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"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the President."
 -- Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.
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 "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,"
 -- A U.S. congressional candidate in Texas.
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 "Half this game is ninety percent mental."
 -- Danny Ozark, manager of Philadelphia Phillies ``````````````````````````````````

 "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment.. It's the
impurities
in our air and water that are doing it."
 -- former U.S. Vice President Al Gore
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 " It's no exaggeration to say that the undecideds could go one way or
another"
 -- George W. Bush, U.S. President
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 "I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."
 -- former U.S. Vice President Dan Quayle
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 "We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we
need?"
 -- former president of American Motors, Lee Iacocca
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 "I was provided with additional input that was radically different from the truth. I assisted in furthering that version."
 -- Colonel Oliver North, from his Iran-Contra testimony.
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 "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
 -- Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback &sports analyst.
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"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
 -- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.
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 "If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
 -- former U.S.. President Bill Clinton,
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 "We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
 -- former U.S. Vice President Al Gore
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 "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."
 -- Keppel Enderbery
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 "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992, because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
 -- State Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina
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 "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."
 -- Mark S. Fowler, former Federal Communications Commission Chairman