Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was probably the greatest political sage this country has ever known. These are some words of wisdom he is reported to have offered:

* 1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

* 2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

* 3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.

* 4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

* 5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

* 6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

* 7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.

* 8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the
electric fence and find out for themselves.

* 9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

* 10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

* 11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.

* 12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

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